Monday, January 25, 2010

Review - Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

Robert Campbell: I'm going to say a couple of words to you and I want you to say the first thing that comes into your mind.
Creighton Duke: Okay.
Robert Campbell: Jason Voorhees.
Creighton Duke: That makes me think of a little girl in a pink dress sticking a hot dog through a doughnut.

Director: Adam Marcus
Starring: Kane Hodder, Steven Williams, John D LeMay, Kari Keegan
Screenplay: Jay Huguely & Adam Marcus

For my reviews I’ve been looking at movies I liked, well enough is enough and it’s time for a change. This has to be the worst Jason movie hands down. Now I’m not going to defend the series as it is pretty damn bad, at the end of the day it’s all about the kills and the cheese and while a lot of people look at the Friday the 13th series with a certain love we have to be truthful. I myself remember when I was about ten staying up late and watching certain Friday the 13th movies with my headphones on so as not to wake up my parents. Jason is an important part of me loving the horror genre, but when I got older I saw a bigger world with far superior movies, still there is a charm to Jason and his wacky antics, a charm that has let the series endure and even go through a reinvention, also a charm that seems to be lacking from Jason Goes to Hell.

The movie opens with Jason chasing a near naked girl through a forest, but quicker than you can yell “Worm Sign” he gets blown up by what seems to be the army. Que probably the best thing about this movie Creighton Duke (Steven Williams) muttering that Jason isn’t dead. Well low and behold it turns out to be true as Jason seems to possess normal people as he makes his way back from the morgue to Crystal Lake to have himself truly reborn by possessing a body of the Voorhees.

Looking at the overall quality of this picture, it just comes off as a quick money spinner. Barring Steven Williams and Kane Hodder all the actors just seem to be going through the motions. The script is pretty piss poor with way to much explanation for something that should have been simple. I can see that the writers were trying to flesh the mythos of Jason but honestly they didn’t need to bother, in fact by trying to introduce something new they committed their biggest mistake. Finally the direction is nothing to write home about, it’s just there.

Now you’re probably wondering what the big mistake of this movie is. Well remember the Dune reference up above? That wasn’t just because I have a hard on for Frank Herbert, that was foreshadowing. For most of the movie Jason Voorhees is a worm. That’s right; one of the biggest, baddest muthas to grace the screen is a god damn worm. Hope you didn’t pay money to just see Jason. I mean one of the main reasons you go to a Jason movie is; let me think; yep I got it Jason. Not only that but Jason killing a lot of people. Maybe if the movie had strong characters and a cool plot this could have been over looked but alas no.

If you are one of those people who have the need to watch every movie in the series then it doesn’t matter what I say you’ve already made a decision. If you are new to Friday the 13th then slap yourself across the face for ever considering watching this first, instead may I recommend you go to the first one and work your way through the first few. If you have watched everything up to this and wonder if you should go ahead and watch it then I’m going to tell you the end just so you can skip it. They kill Jason and Freddy’s claw drags his mask down to hell. There done. Now go watch Freddy vs Jason and Jason X as these may be bad movies but they are so much better than this one.

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